So you’ve undoubtedly heard about how the Mayan calendar ends in 2012.  Then you tried to drop this knowledge casually in to a conversation over a beer to flex your superior intellect and were quickly informed that the Mayan calendar doesn’t end in 2012, but instead resets as is detailed in this USA Today article.

This article basically concludes that the whole 2012 craze is being hyped up by the media in order to sell books and just plain get people’s attention on their website, so that those same people will click on an ad for Long Distance Calling plans and Google will kick their site some change.  The premise of their argument is that their is no way a society as primitive as the Mayans could possibly predict something like this.  I’ll leave the argument of whether the direction our society has headed in is “progress” or not for another time, and stick to the facts for you.

Here’s an article basically trying to say that the calendar is like a car’s odometer.  When we reach 5125 years (in 2012) the odometer is basically going to be at all 9′s and roll over to zeros turning the one to a two on the left side of the odometer.  This could be apt, but we can’t be sure that there is a 1 all the way to the left.  I mean this started back in 3000 BC.  We don’t really know what happened back in 3000 BC.  For all we know the odometer looks like 9999 and there is no slot to the left.  This thing just completely resets.

The article goes on to detail the mysterious appearance of a reverse polarity sun spot a few months back that typically signals the start of a new Solar Cycle.  This means the sun is going to get stormy, whatever that means.  Should I continue to not stare directly at it?  Sure thing.  One of the You Tube clips I watched (I’ll spare you this one as it was boring besides this tidbit) went as far as to say the storminess is predicted to peak on Dec 23…wait for it…wait for it…2012.  A couple days late, but hey, hopefully I will be ascended in to heaven before the devil starts raining fire and brimstone (come on Pat Menard, pull me up buddy.  J/k Jesus, you’re my homeboy.)

It just…got…interesting.  The USA Today article touched on the fact that our Sun will be aligned with the Milky Way during the Winter Solstice on Dec 21, 2012.  Here is some video I dug up of the last time this happened 26,000 years ago.  I think Dolph Lundgren might be Jesus.  That means Sylvester Stalone is even more badass than previously thought.  Chuck Norris ain’t got shit on that.  The interesting part comes from the other article though which details how the Milky Way and the Earth Cross…or something about the Zodiac Cross…I don’t really know.  My eyes glaze over whenever the term Zodiac is used.  However, I did skip to the bottom and apparently two celestial bodies in combination with the Earth are going to make a cross that hasn’t happened in 26,000 years.  You know what else happened 26,000 years ago?  This man was born.  But seriously, a cross.  A freakin’ cross is going to be formed by the celestial bodies.  Apparently this is all going to take place over an acient Toltec metropolis called Teotihuacan.  The major road in this town is alligned with the where the Milky Way will be on Dec 21, 2012.  The road’s nickname?  The Road to the Underworld.

So in review our the Mayan’s “Road to the Underworld”, the center of the Milky Way (described by the author as the center of our galaxy, not sure where he gets that from), the Zodiac, Moses’s bo staff, Muhammad’s grave, and Ron L Hubbard’s golden stones from which he wrote his religious books will all be aligned come Dec. 21, 2001.  Well, maybe just the first 3.  See, this is how things get out of hand.  Those first 3 will be lined up to form a cross.  I don’t need to go over the significance of a cross.

The article further delves in to the Zodiac sign stuff as I further delved in to sleep, but the jist of it is that the celestial bodies will be perfectly forming shapes that stand for God and spiritual transition.  Now, as you realize from reading this I put no stock in Zodiological signs and all that shit, but before people and newspapers got their grubby hands all over them and made the whole thing in to generalized predictions of whether Johnny was going to call you back or not that girls just eat up, the practice probably came from somewhere profound.  Like everything, once people get their hands on it and spin it, it loses credibility (like this article is doing to the impending apocalypse).  So let’s give it some stock, especially considering how accurately this article says things are going to line up.

The article concludes talking about the Chinese Four Pillar chart which is their old school calendar that doesn’t allow you to pencil in your doctor’s appointment either.  This is really reaching because I don’t even see any reference to Dec. 21, 2012.  Wait a second, I read somewhere (this blog entry) that the Chinese Four Pillar chart and Dec. 21, 2012 are related.  They were even in the same paragraph.  Holy crap!  Now, we’re getting somewhere.  But seriously, the four pillars are where you get the predictions of massive flooding, meteors hitting the Earth, and tsunamis.  It makes sense that a meteor hitting the Earth could easily cause the other two and the book of Revalations refers to a meteor hitting the Earth, but this doesn’t seem to have a link to Dec. 21, 2012.

12/21/12:  That in and of itself has to mean something right?

The article keeps going, but all I see is a lot of crop circles, so I’m done with this.  Make sure you check out the pictures of the Milky Way in the top half of the article though.  Those are pretty bad ass.

All I know is that it would be pretty damn cool to be in Teotihuacan on 12/21/12 at 11:11 pm staring up in to the Milky Way as the “Road to the Underworld” started shaking and split open.  However, my best guess (as a Christian) is that this is where the blood thirsty locusts, multi-headed, ram footed, monsters, and horn playing angels of doom would come from.  Seriously, that’s my best guess given all of the religious significance that has been attributed to this event (or tacked on by our age old game of telephone).  All I know is that there would be no sense in hiding.  I’d want to be up there front row.  I wonder if they’ll sell t-shirts?

I realize you probably think I am dumb and borderline wear a helmet at all times in public retarded for thinking this, but you just read this whole thing written by me, so maybe it’s time you got fitted for a helmet.  None of us know what the hell were talking about, but it sure as hell seems like something is going to go down on 12/21/12.  Make sure you’re with people you care about, just in case.

Eh, what do I know.  I hate this blogging stuff anyways. (I’m working on the popular writing technique of ending on the same subject I started with…key word: working).

Please feel free to comment with any cool shit you may know about 2012 as well.  I’m interested as you can tell.

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I read a very interesting article in Evan’s blog exploring the possibility of our universe spawning from empty space in another, previous universe.  It’s a very interesting theory (odds are it’s probably wrong), but that’s not what I’m here to talk about.  Even if it is right, what cracks me up is that some people would take this as a blow to Creationists.  Proving that a universe spawned from another universe, still leaves you with the question of where the first universe came from.

Take any argument against Creationism, take out the matter or impulse that is involved in that argument, and ask yourself where they came from.

The Big Bang supposedly occurred because a bunch of matter became very dense and hot and then boom, our universe was spawned.  Take 5 more seconds and ask yourself where that matter came from?

Primordial ooze might have spawned life, but something spawned primordial ooze.

At some point something had to be created to form what either evolved or was shaped in to what we know today as our universe.  You can’t get something from nothing without some sort of intervention that goes beyond the physical laws that govern our universe…

Ever since my short lived stint as a Beirut journalist ended at article 49 (those articles can be found here and in the archives), I have been making due with using my GChat status message space to force my ideas and beliefs on to others.  Too often some of my thoughts don’t fit in to this space, so this blog will be used as a supplement.  Any time I have a post that is too big, it will get dropped in here and linked from my GChat status.

The inspiration for the name comes from Evan Cohick’s blog named Two Puppies Enter, One Leaves.  That and the fact one of his posts is the inspiration for my first post.  Let’s see where this thing goes.  Hopefully some day my grandkids read these words with pride thinking to themselves, ‘I can’t believe the supreme chancellor of the world used to misuse the words there, their, and they’re so much.’